Bereavement

Bereavement refers to losing someone important to you — a friend, family member, or someone you cared about deeply. Grief is the process of reacting to that loss. It can affect people in many different ways, both emotionally and physically. There is no “right” or “wrong” way to grieve everyone’s experience is different, and different feelings are all valid.

Common reactions to loss include shock or numbness, sadness, crying, tiredness or exhaustion, and sometimes anger or guilt. You might also feel confused, or find that your emotions come in waves — one moment you feel okay, the next moment overwhelmed.

Because grief affects people differently, reactions can vary. Some things you may notice:

• Intense sadness, longing, or emptiness

• Trouble sleeping or feeling very tired

• Difficulty focusing or doing everyday tasks

• Changes in appetite or eating habits

• Feeling angry, guilty or confused

• Withdrawal from friends or activities

• A desire to talk about the person who has died — or a need for time alone

There is no “normal timetable” for grief. Some days may be easier; some harder. It’s okay if you feel like you’re doing “fine” one day and find it hard the next.

While grief can feel overwhelming, there are helpful things many people find support them through loss. What works will be individual, some ideas might help one person but not another. Here are some common approaches:

• Talk about how you feel: Sharing memories or talking about the person who died can help. Talking doesn’t mean forgetting — it can help keep their memory alive.

• Find someone you trust: Could be a friend, family member, school/college support, or a counsellor. It’s okay to choose who you feel comfortable with.

• Give yourself time: You might need more rest, or time away from usual responsibilities. Grief doesn’t follow a schedule.

• Express feelings in creative ways: Writing, drawing, or keeping a journal can help you make sense of difficult thoughts and emotions.

• Stick to small routines: Even simple day-to-day routines — meals, sleep, small tasks — can help you feel grounded when things feel shaky.

• Be gentle with yourself: Missing someone, feeling sad or upset — these reactions are not weaknesses, but signs of love and loss.

If someone you know is grieving, it can be hard to know what to say or do. But often, what helps most is simply being there and listening.

Helpful ways to support someone grieving:

• Acknowledge their loss — even a simple “I’m sorry for your loss” can mean a lot.

• Let them talk about the person who died, and listen without pressure or judgement.

• Offer to spend time together, or suggest simple activities — a walk, watching a film, doing something low-key.

• Keep checking in, even after the first few weeks. Loss doesn’t end at the funeral.

• Respect their feelings — grief can look different for different people; there is no “correct” way to show it.

Avoid saying things that minimise their pain — phrases like “they’re in a better place now,” or “you’ll get over it,” or “at least they lived a long life” can feel dismissive and hurtful.

Sometimes grief can feel too heavy to carry alone, especially if you feel stuck, overwhelmed, or unable to cope over time. If that happens — talking to a counsellor, mental-health professional, or bereavement support service can help.

There are services designed to help young people with bereavement — it’s OK to reach out.

Losing someone you care about can feel like a wound — deep, painful and confusing. But grief is also a sign of love. The sadness shows you cared. The memories matter. The feelings show someone was important.

You don’t have to “get over” grief — you can learn to live with it, carry memories, and find ways to heal in your own time. You don’t have to walk this path alone. Support, understanding and time can help.