Anger
Anger is something we all experience at some level and it’s a completely normal emotion.
Some of us have more of it than others. The better we understand it the better we will be able to manage it.
Anger demands attention and can lead to aggressive behaviour. Anger is an emotional response to panic, telling our brains rightly or wrongly, that we are in danger.
The way anger is released is typically through aggressive behaviour which, leads to people in return rejecting the angry person or behaving aggressively in return. Both of these responses will cause more anger creating a vicious circle.
The more we understand how and why we become angry the better we will be able to manage it especially in difficult situations.
Why do we lose control of our emotions?
Simple, easy-to-understand whiteboard animation to help early you gain an understanding of the way your brains work to recognize and manage your emotions.
Short film by Kids want to Know
Understanding your anger
Anger is a natural part of our life and is not wrong or bad but a normal feeling and emotion and sometimes a way of coping.
The problem with anger is how people express and deal with their anger.
Anger is a tricky emotion to manage especially teenagers, however teenagers don’t have to be victims to their anger.
Anger can become explosive with verbal and physical actions that could potentially harm them or those around them.
Picking up the pieces afterwards can be exhausting.
Anger is a normal emotion that can give you a loss of power and control Anger itself is NOT the problem.
Anger can damage important relationships.
If anger is not managed well it can become explosive and destructive.
Fight Flight Freeze – Anxiety Explained For Teens
(www.anxietycanada.com) Watch this video developed by Anxiety Canada to learn how anxiety keeps us alive, and how worries in your head affect what you feel in your body.
Styles of Anger
What are the different types of anger?
Anger shows itself in a number of ways through: Physical (Like hitting out), verbal (using your voice to demonstrate your anger,) emotional (through your emotions like crying), cyberbullying (using your phone, computer or social media)
How does anger make you feel?
Anger can give you a wide range of emotions from the obvious to the not so obvious. Anger, hatred, hurting, hoping, horror, a feeling of being overwhelmed.
How does anger impact you long term?
Persistent Anger can lead to feelings of, low self-esteem, poor academic achievement, feeling alone, increasing anger levels, anxiety, stress, exclusion.
Uncontrollable anger can be disastrous for your life, learn how to control anger and trigger change.
You see, we've all had a fair share of experience when it comes to being angry! While most of us feel regret and remorse after cooling off, we don't know how to control anger in a better way.
Consequences of anger
Important relationships can be damaged by bad responses to anger like friends, family and teachers. Exclusions, criminal records, hurt to yourself and others, damage to education and sadness.
Are You: Passive Aggressive or Assertive?
Aggressive Behaviour: Interrupts and ‘talks over’ others
Assertive Behaviours: Speaks openly
Passive Behaviour: Speaks softly
Aggressive Behaviour: Speaks loudly
Assertive Behaviour: Uses a conversational tone
Passive Behaviours: Avoids looking at people
Aggressive Behaviours: Glares and stares at others
Assertive Behaviours: Makes good eye contact
Passive Behaviours: Shows little or no expression
Aggressive Behaviours: Intimidates others with expressions
Assertive Behaviours: Shows expression that matches the message.
Passive Behaviours: Slouches and withdraws
Aggressive Behaviours: Stands rigidly, crosses arms, ‘invades others’ personal space.
Assertive Behaviours: Relaxes and adopts an open posture and expressions.
Passive Behaviours: Isolates self from groups
Aggressive Behaviours: Controls groups
Assertive Behaviours: Participates in Groups
Passive Behaviours: Agrees with others, despite feelings
Aggressive Behaviours: Only considers own feelings, and/or demands of others
Assertive Behaviours: Speaks to the point
Passive Behaviours: Values self less than others
Aggressive Behaviours: Values Self more than others
Assertive Behaviours: Values equal to others
Passive Behaviours: Hurts Self to avoid hurting others
Aggressive Behaviours: Hurts others to avoid being hurt
Assertive Behaviours: Tries to hurt no one (including Self)
Passive Behaviours: Does not reach goals and may not know goals
Aggressive Behaviours: Reaches goals but hurts others in the process
Assertive Behaviours: Usually reaches goals but hurts others in the process
Passive Behaviours: You’re okay, I’m not
Aggressive Behaviours: I’m okay, you’re not
Assertive Behaviours: I’m okay, you’re okay
Calming down Techniques
Calming down in a angry moment can be difficult but it helps to identify the things that work for you to help you when you need it.
Listen to Music
Go for a walk or run
Play music, an instrument, draw or paint
Write about your feelings in a journal
Talk to someone you trust about it
Scream into a pillow
Take deep breaths
Walk away
Self -talk “I can’t handle this” or “this isn’t worth it”
Tense Muscles up in your body and relax them repeatedly
Picture a positive place or something you are looking forward to
Go to a private space to think
Slow things down when in a difficult situation
Stop and think before reacting
Be Assertive let others know you are getting angry and need space
Think of other ways to calm down!
How you can help me Calm Down!
Let the adults and people around you know how they can help you in an angry moment.
Hug me or put your arm around me
Don’t talk, and just Listen.
Remind me about the consequences
Tell me something funny
Try to Distract me
Tell me that you Love me
Talk to me Calmly
Send me to my room
Stay close to me
Let me explain why I’m Mad
Give me Time and space
Help me use my coping skills
Ignore me
Ask me how I’m feeling
Help me solve my problems
Health Services in Schools Youth Workers
HSIS Youth Workers support young people in Wirral Secondary Schools, Wirral Sixth Form College and Wirral Met College.
Each school/college has a designated HSIS Youth Worker that provides young people with an opportunity to access confidential support on any issues which may be affecting them.
We provide support to young people on a wide range of issues and topics such as: building resilience, reducing risks, healthy relationships, sexual Health (including issuing condoms in some schools) drugs, alcohol, emotional health, Stress and Anxiety.
To find your youth worker visit their page.
Response Counselling Service
The Response counselling service works with young people aged 13-18. It is a free confidential service working with young people with moderate to severe issues which include suicide ideation, self harming, depression, high levels of anxiety bereavement etc.
We also work with the Response Alcohol and drugs team as many referral come for both services. Our work is separate from but alongside CAMHS, sharing risk between the 2 services. The referral system is usually by filling in a referral form and sending it by email unless it’s a parent referring and we can take it over the phone. We can only accept referral if it’s with the consent of the young person.
If a young person mentioned suicide then it’s fine for a worker to talk with them but it does need referring on, talking about suicide will never increase the risk of a young person taking their own life.
Self harm can include many ways , it is a physical way of dealing with an emotion. Again it needs referring on as stopping a young person from harming themselves isn’t going to deal with why they are having to do it.
Response coordinator 01516664123/3783 email barrymarsden@wirral.gov.uk
Emergency-ring 999
Present at Arrowe Park Hospital Liaison and psychiatry.
24 hour mental health line 03003033972 any age.
CAMHS advice and duty line 0151 488 8453
hatch
hatch is here to make sure that you have emotional wellbeing support.
Much of the time we are not born with the innate ability to cope with these things on our own.
This is where we can help. hatch provide 1-1 sessions to help develop a range of skills and strategies that can have a positive impact on your mental health and wellbeing. Our volunteer mentors support you to complete a computerised CBT skills intervention called Bazaar -that explores which things work best for you. CBT stands for Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, which sounds pretty intimidating. What it actually means is learning a way of thinking that helps us face tough times in a positive way.
hatch support Wirral Young People aged 11 -16yrs
To get in touch about accessing hatch please head to our website and complete a referral form via our 'Get in touch' page.
Access is free and immediate.
Twitter: @hatchmerseyside
Instagram: @hatchmerseyside
Website: hatchmerseyside.co.uk
OPEN DOOR CENTRE
If you are aged 17 - 30, you can become a member and then access as many of our services as you like, including Creative Therapeutic Support if you are feeling down, low, stressed or anxious, numerous different activities within music and the arts, unique training and volunteering opportunities and much more. Membership is free, with no waiting lists.
CAMHS Advice Line
This site was created for young people, carers and professionals to pool together lots of helpful resources from across the internet.
24 hour mental health line 0800 145 6485 any age.
Action for Children (Counselling)
Best start in life
We know how important the early years are - and we’re here to help. From parenting advice to education and early intervention, we focus on improving children’s life chances.
Good mental health
Everyone has ups and downs in life. Our mental and emotional well-being experts work with families and schools to make sure children and parents feel able to cope with challenges when they arise.
A safe and loving home
We make sure more children feel part of a family that cares for them. We find homes for those without, protect children who have been abused or neglected, and help ensure young carers don’t miss out on a childhood.
KOOTH (Online counselling)
Free, safe and anonymous online support for young people
Monday – Friday 12pm – 10pm
Saturday – Sunday 6pm – 10pm
SHOUT
Shout is an affiliate of Crisis Text Line® in the UK that provides free, confidential support, 24/7 via text. It’s the first free 24/7 texting service in the UK for anyone in crisis anytime, anywhere. Shout is available in England, Scotland, Wales, and Northern Ireland
Text SHOUT to 85258 in the UK to text with a trained Crisis Volunteer
or
Text BLUE to 85258 to get resources and sign posting information.
Every texter is connected with a real-life human being trained to bring people from a hot moment to a cool calm place through active listening and collaborative problem-solving. All of our Crisis Volunteers donate their time to helping people in crisis.
Anxiety UK
Provides information, support and advice for anyone struggling with anxiety.
Live chat service available.
Phone: 03444 775 774
Text: 07537 416 905
Email: support@anxietyuk.org.uk
Opening times: 9.30am-5.30pm, Monday-Friday
No Panic
Supports people struggling with panic attacks, obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), phobias and other anxiety-related issues related - and provides support and information for their carers.
Offers a specialist youth helpline for people aged 13-20. The opening hours are 3pm - 6pm, Monday - Friday; 6pm - 8pm, Thursdays and Saturdays.
Call 01952 680835 for a recorded breathing exercise to help you through a panic attack (available 24/7).
Information about call costs here.
Phone: 0300 7729844
Phone: 0330 606 1174 (Youth helpline)
Email: sarah@nopanic.org.uk
Opening times: 10am - 10pm, 365 days a year
OCD Action
Offers support and information to anybody affected by obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD).
Website provides information and advice to help you access treatment.
Phone: 0300 636 5478
Email: support@ocdaction.org.uk
Email: youthhelpline@ocdaction.org.uk
Opening times: 9:30am - 8pm, Monday - Friday
The Mix
Offers support to anyone under 25 about anything that’s troubling them.
Email support available via their online contact form.
Free 1-2-1 webchat service available.
Free short-term counselling service available.
Phone: 0808 808 4994
Opening times: 4pm - 11pm, seven days a week
Childline
If you’re under 19 you can confidentially call, chat online or email about any problem big or small.
Sign up for a free Childline locker (real name or email address not needed) to use their free 1-2-1 counsellor chat and email support service.
Can provide a BSL interpreter if you are deaf or hearing-impaired.
Hosts online message boards where you can share your experiences, have fun and get support from other young people in similar situations.
Phone: 0800 1111
Opening times: 9am - midnight, 365 days a year
YoungMinds Crisis Messenger
Provides free, 24/7 text support for young people across the UK experiencing a mental health crisis.
All texts are answered by trained volunteers, with support from experienced clinical supervisors.
Texts are free from EE, O2, Vodafone, 3, Virgin Mobile, BT Mobile, GiffGaff, Tesco Mobile and Telecom Plus.
Texts can be anonymous, but if the volunteer believes you are at immediate risk of harm, they may share your details with people who can provide support.
Text: YM to 85258
Opening times: 24/7